


So Easy

by missblatherskite



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, alec/jace is only mentioned and completely one sided, seriously do not read if triggered by suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-26 21:37:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13866495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missblatherskite/pseuds/missblatherskite
Summary: The night on he balcony wasn't the first time Alec almost killed himself.





	So Easy

It didn’t even look that far, really. And it would be so, so easy. So easy to climb up on the edge, so easy to let himself fall. He wouldn’t even have to jump, just lean forward….

 

Everything could be over in seconds. His responsibilities, his inadequacies, his feeling for Jace…God, Jace. As much as butterflies wanted to bloom at the thought of him, instead he felt sick. He was in love with his parabatai, his brother. What was wrong with him?

 

The longer he stood here, the more he thought of everything, the more he was convinced that this was the right thing. He was going to do it. He was going to climb up on the ledge and let himself fall over it.

 

He took a deep breath and climbed up. The height didn’t scare him, the ground below didn’t scare him. Instead he felt peace wash over him. For the first time in a while everything felt right.

 

“Hey, Alec what…”

 

Alec turned, and Jace stopped at the sight of him, at the look in his eyes. And dread came over him because he knew, he _knew_ what Alec was thinking. The parabatai bond and how he looked here— _he knew._

 

“Alec, let’s get away off the ledge, buddy.”

 

“I, Jace—This isn’t what it looks like,” Alec stuttered out, eyes wide and panicked.

 

“Okay, okay. Just—get off the ledge. Please, Alec?” He tried to keep his voice calm, light but there was desperation in it. Alec could feel the panic through their bond.

 

Taking a breath he stepped down, forced a smile on his face.

 

“I was just—“

 

“Bullshit. You were going to kill yourself, Alec!”

 

“No, I—I just…” He took a breath.

 

“I’m so tired, Jace.”

 

He didn’t respond, just strode over quickly and drew him into a tight hug, tears prickling his eyes.

 

“Parabatai, please. I love you, Alec. We all love you.”

 

Alce didn’t respond, just clung to him tighter. It was a while before they let go of each other.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism is always welcome.


End file.
